Addiction: Sportscenter

Many famous philosophers have hypothesized that, as advertised, ESPN is truly The Worldwide Leader in Sports. And who am I, or anyone with no knowledge of the world of sports broadcasting, to say otherwise. From Monday Night Football, to prime-time games, to a newly-acquired Wimbledon contract, ESPN has certainly created a near monopoly on sports broadcasting. The two cable channels, as well as the online ESPN3.com, and the oft forgotten ESPNU (channel 788 for all you Comcast aficionados), are often the subject of my mid-afternoon gaze. It seems that ESPN has created what I have always wanted, a guaranteed source of sports commentary amidst the regular drudgery of flipping through cable television. Yet it is this easy dependence that is a blessing and a curse of the TV world.

In the first of many in a series of posts with the title Addiction, I will examine the television version of heroin, otherwise known as Sportscenter.

To many, Sportscenter is either an unknown term, or a lightly familiar television show on ESPN. But to people like me, people who follow the world of sports, ESPN is like, well, heroin. I know that my case of addiction may be a little severe, but I am not ashamed to admit that on many occasions, I have viewed the same edition of Sportscenter more than once. And not for lack of knowledge that it was the same episode, but due to my yearning for just a little more, if even the slightest bit more information on the world of sports on that day.

Now, for those of you who are unaware of how Sportscenter works, allow me to explain. Throughout the day, professional sporting events happen throughout the world. And Sportscenter, the genius, captivating drug that it is, mushes all of that sports goodness into an hour of action packed, high flying coverage. The dialogue is occasionally littered with joking tones and friendly conversations, but for the most part, it is an all-sports version of the news. And although excerpts of the show continue throughout the day, new information is continuously added until, during the prime time of the night, the 100th (or so it may seem) episode of the day airs, full of everything from the day.

Anyway, now that everyone is up to speed, allow me to explain how this seemingly great outlet of sports information really can be characterized by the negative side effects of hard core drugs as well. Despite keeping you from your family and friends for days on end, much like many drugs, Sportscenter slowly becomes a part of you, and all of the batting averages and ERA's are planted in your head until you become a walking sports encyclopedia. Even I often am puzzled at how much relatively useless information I retain while watching the show, until I realize I've heard them talk about Albert Pujols' broken arm 18 times. It has basically gotten to the point where I could listen to Sportscenter analysts talk about trades and drafts and matchups for days on end. And it is this depressing fact that leads me to the "dealbreaker" of this whole situation: I can't figure out why I trust these analysts in the first place.

I have said many times that I do not believe being a professional athlete gives you the right to decide something like who a team should draft, or how owners should proceed during a lockout. Outside of the likes of Lee Corso and Lou Holtz, the analysts hold no comedic ability, and barely are capable of completing a sentence. Sportscenter will often show the "Sports Résumé" of an athlete, only for me to discover that the played NFL quarterback on 6 teams in 7 years, and have completed 15 career touchdowns. Yeah, now I trust that you think an NFL team is in dire need of a new free safety in the upcoming draft. And yet, although I find that I frequently disagree with the analysts, I am captivated by their opinion.

However, will all of my wonderful critiques of Sportscenter convince me to stop watching? Of course not. Where the hell else can I watch hours upon hours of highlights from all of the sports activities of the day?

And for all of you who do watch Sportscenter for your highlight needs, I encourage you to come here for everything else... Because with two lockouts this summer, anyone who isn't a baseball freak, may need a little more stimulation.